I'm a graphic designer from San Francisco. I'd never been to Tibet before and have only seen a handful of pictures of it. I have a friend who's been here a couple of times, and whenever he talks about it, he gets a dreamy, far-away, happy look. Based on that, I was pretty sure I was in for a really special experience.

The little I knew about the Tibetan political situation before the trip was that it seemed to be a mess; that China claimed Tibet on the basis of ancient history, that its official position is to protect the Tibetan culture, but that the unofficial position seemed to be one of assimilating and melding the Tibetan way of life into Chinese culture until it completely disappears. So I was very curious,I guess worried, really, about what will happen in the long run. Will Tibet really continue to exist or just become an artifact?

I took the trip to Tibet in September last year. The airport there is the most spectacular Ive ever seen, tucked neatly into the midst of immense hills.

On the first day of the trip, I went to Xigaze, the second largest town in Tibet, and visited the Tashilhunpo Monastery, the traditional seat of the Panchen Lama. It's huge, and we saw only a small portion of it, but I think that what we saw of it was its most spectacular site. I had no idea what was in one of the rooms we were taken to until we pulled aside the curtain and stepped inside. It was dark, lit with yak butter candles that illuminated golden ornaments, pictures and offerings. Then I looked up, and this magnificent, unbelievably huge Buddha was right there. And it was just overwhelming. He had the greatest look on his face. It was so serene. Just looking at him really made me feel serene as well. And I could have just sat there and stared at his quiet, peaceful eyes. This was definitely the most beautiful man-made structure I've ever seen. It was just amazing. So if that had been the only thing we had seen in Xigaze it would've been totally worth the 8-hour bus ride here and back.

In Xiagze, I also played some pretty close to 8-ball, just slightly modified. Three games for 3 yuan -- less than 50 cents. That's a pretty good deal. And not the tiny bar tables you get back home either; this was good stuff and a lot of fun. They're all real friendly, everybody wants to help you line up your next shot. It's like a community effort. Everybody's like, "You should hit this ball, naaaaw, you should hit this one! Nooooo, this one¡¯s a good one".

On day 5, we visited the Samye Monastery, and in the evening went out for dinner and Tibetan dance. MTV meets ancient Tibet meets whatever karaoke. Crazy costumes. I don't know exactly how cowgirl outfits with red cowboy hats dancing to a disco beat from the 80s works into ancient Tibetan traditions, but well, there it was. Then the director invited us into another room to uh "Please, please come, we'll sip some drinks and discuss" which turned out to be a ganbei (bottoms up)fest. Just "One, two, three, ganbei! One, two, three, ganbei!" and they just kept coming at us. More ganbei. It would¡¯ve been okay if it hadn't been Budweiser. Why did it have to be Budweiser? And just then, on top of that, all the singers and performers surrounded and sang for us. Beautiful, beautiful singing, but just totally totally surreal. And every song had to finish with "ganbei!".

On day 6, we went back to Lhasa and visited two Tibetan households. The first one was Kalsang Phuntso's house, in the suburbs. One room was entirely devoted to a Buddhist altar, so it was almost like he had his own little monastery inside the house. A poster of Mao hung on the wall. It was interesting to note how devout he was, yet how much he appreciates the recent changes in Tibet.

Later we did a city version of the visit. We went to a kind of apartment complex in the Tibetan quarter and met a man named Yixi of 69 years old. He invited us into his apartment. It was a great deal smaller than the suburban house. His apartment could probably fit in the main sitting room of Kalsang Phuntso's, but was nice and cozy. He also had one room entirely dedicated to a Buddhist shrine and Mao on the wall. He spoke warmly about the current government, how they've raised the standard of living and changed Tibet for the better.

It was actually a really interesting experience, because it got me thinking a lot. My first knee-jerk reaction was, "Oh, he's a shill for the government," because it was actually a government-arranged visit. So I thought, "Oh, he's just spouting the communist party line because they told him to." Then the more I thought about it, the more it seemed to me that Tibet was probably an extremely rough place to live before the communist takeover. The standard of living has probably gotten a whole lot better. This man has a nice apartment, but Lord knows where he lived as a young kid, or when he was 15 to 20. So the more I learn, the more confused I get about the whole situation, which I think is actually a very good thing, because before coming here, all I knew about Tibet was the American media policy and what America told me to think about it. So it was good to come here and get a broader perspective. It may not be clearing anything up for me, but it's at least making me think more and realize that everything I know, I don't really know.

My biggest change in perception after spending time here in Tibet ¨C and I'm really surprised about this ¨Cis that I'm no longer sure that Tibet really needs to be an independent nation. Before I came, "Free Tibet" seemed like such an want Tibet to be free? But having been there and talked to Tibetans about the whole situation, I'm not at all sure that Tibet needs to be an independent state, and far from convinced that most Tibetans even want it to be.

I think the most important advice I could give to anybody thinking of traveling to Tibet is to come with an open mind, and try to let go of all of the pre-conceived notions you have about it. I know I had lots that were sort of force-fed to me, and I'm now discovering that the American media and the American point of view are really, very one-sided. It was hard at first to not have knee-jerk reactions to everything anybody said, but after a while I managed to suppress them. It's been two weeks, and I'm starting to get over my preconceived ideas of what communism is and what free Tibet is all about, and now actually listen, look and see what's going on. I think that's very important for anyone who plans to come here.

China Today Magazine
JON MOGGIO